Dear, Henley June,
This story has no theological implications whatsoever, well that’s not true; for every moments is dripping with theological implications. Regardless of its depth, this story from my single days is just downright funny.
My mom and two sisters were visiting me from Texas. Now, when I travel, I intentionally avoid eating at chain restaurants. How can one truly enjoy the unique flavor of a new place without tasting its native cuisine? This is not the case for my baby sister, Andy. Wherever she travels she must eat at P.F.Changs, and this weekend was no different.
As the four of us got comfy in our booth and scanned our menu (even though we all knew we would inevitably order lettuce wraps), the warm smell of musky vanilla got my attention. I peered over the top of my menu to see this oddly ripped, blond waiter with metro-sexual (Drew Cary) specs. “You ladies been here before”? he said. Due to Andy’s love affair with P.F., we all giggled and rolled our eyes as if to say, “Yes, way too much.”
After much meaningless small talk, he took our drink orders and was on his way. My mom, who at times lacks the awareness of her own volume, said to me, “Now that’s the kind of guy I could see you dating.” I viewed this line as over-used three random men before him. However, I kindly nodded and piled the meat into my lettuce wrap.
Glasses empty and tummies full, it was time for the check. What a fun meal, what with the tableside entertainment of our comic server. He brought us all fortune cookies and handed one directly to me while the other three carelessly fell to the table. “This one’s for you”. He said. I timidly broke apart my cookie. Out fell the expected slip of paper with his phone number on it. My mom and sisters exploded with glee.
About a week later, we met up for a date. We went downtown to one of the beautiful old theatres for a Japanese gymnast show. He was embarrassingly loud in his applauding. On the way out of the theatre, he nonchalantly mentioned that some of the show’s song would enhance his work’s playlist. “Works playlist? As a waiter?” I asked. “Oh. No.” He nervously laughed, “P.F. Changsis my side job. I am a stripper.” My heart stopped. “Come again?” I said. “Yep, I can easily bring in $500 at one bachelorette party. I love it.” He responded. “You are kidding me.” I shared. “Nope.” He smirked.
“This is too funny.” I laughed aloud, “ you won’t believe what I do for a living.” I said. “No way-are you a stripper too?” Our stroll back to the car was now halted as we talked on the sidewalk. “No. No. Goodness no. I am a children’s minister.” I said proudly. “You don’t say?” He was a bit shocked. “Well here we are, you – Jesus and I’m your Mary Magdalene.” We both chuckled.
When we got to our cars, our hug goodbye soon turned into a kiss. While this was not my plan, I would be lying if I was to say I hated it. However, I knew this date would lead to a funny story and nothing more. Keeping this kiss short (much shorter than he wanted) I forced myself to get in my car and turn the key as quickly as I could.
Though we did not go on a second date for obvious reasons, we had many meaningful phone conversations. He asked lots of questions about God and the church. I asked lots of questions about the club scene that many of my fellow millennials spent their time. He would often call me after his gigs.
About after two months of phone conversations, he finally realized that we would never be more than friends. In one of our final conversations he told me something I will always appreciate. He said, “You are not the type of girl I run into at bars or clubs.” “I’m not?! That’s a shocker.” I sarcastically said. “Hee-hee. Funny. No you’re not. You’re not at all. You are different because you are the marrying-type, they are all the dating type. Sure, they’re fun for a while, but that type of fun fades.”
While our connection faded years ago, I pray that my daughter will someday hear these same words (hopefully not from a stripper). Strive to be the “marrying type”. Keep your standards high and never settle to live merely as the “dating type”.